Beautiful Child

Rennie looked at herself in the mirror and sighed. Putting a hand on the back of her head, she fingered her blond and black dyed hair. She let her hand fall again, glaring at herself.
“Its hopeless.” she thought. “We do I need to do this everyday?”
There was a simple answer, but Rennie couldn’t help thinking the question. She quickly smeared black lipstick on her cracked lips.
There.
It covered up the bleeding parts anyway. Setting it down, Rennie grabbed her backpack from the floor and slung it across her back. It was a Sunday: No school, which she was thankful. Opening the door to her room quietly, she looked around. No one was in the living room. She stole silently across the carpet, her shoe’s making little thumping noises. She opened the back door and stepped out. It was a cold fall day, but the sound of the wind was drowned out by cars driving past there house. Rennie set off, heading towards the local park where she might have a bit of peace and quiet for a while. She pulled out her phone and checked the time. 8:23, plenty of time before she had to go back for lunch. Putting it pack in her pocket, she looked up at the sky. It was clear blue, a classic not-a-cloud-in-sight kind of day, but she didn’t feel cheered up. It just was another day that she was alive. She bit her lip, chiding herself for thinking that. But it was true. She bowed her head, looking at her shoes.
As she approached the park, she heard several people laughing. Rennie looked up and saw the Gang. They didn’t really have a name, just the Gang. The Gang outside, the Bullies at school and Rennie didn’t want to know what they were called at home. It was a little surprising that they went to school at all, but they did. They went to her school. Fear began to rise in her throat. She looked at the ground again, trying to the small and unimportant.
“Hey, look guys. Its Rennie.” Tyler, the leader of the group said. A tinge of scorn was in his voice.
Rennie kept walking and ran slap-bang into a Gang who had stepped in her path. He smiled.
“Looks that way.”
Rennie turned to see several of them walking towards her.
“Why don’t you stay for a while, Rennie?” Tyler said, his white teeth showing.
Rennie took a step back, biting her lip.
“Why do you need to wear lipstick, girly?” he asked. He reached out his hand and touched her cheek lightly. “Is it to hide how ugly you are?”
Rennie slapped his hand away. Turning, she pushed past the guy in her way.
As her face was turned, a tear ran down her cheek.
Tyler called after her, “I can’t wait to see you at school, you little…” She shut out the last word he said and just kept walking. Her tears were flowing freely now as she hugged herself. Little sounds of her pain escaped her lips, but no one heard them.
She walked towards a pond, its water still and cold. Rennie walked to the edge and starred at her refection. Her mascara was running down her face so much that it looked like she was crying black tears. She bent down and touched the grass. This was wear her older sister had committed suicide, it seemed like a good spot. Rennie let the backpack fall from her shoulders, taking the weight off her back. Reaching inside, she felt around until her hand fell on a knife handle. She grasped it in her fist and pulled it out. It was a long switch blade, but it only had one long blade. She unfolded it, testing the edge with her finger tip. It cut in a little and she let the blood flow. Rennie had been sharpening it all the last night but had not really made up her mind until today.
Gripping it tight, she stretched out her arm, the knife pointing at her chest. Taking a breath, she stabbed.
The world grew dark then a hand was holding hers.
“Rennie? Is she awake, Doctor?”
She felt someone touched the side of her neck.
“She’ll wake up when she’s ready. I’ll be back to check on her in a few minutes.”
Rennie heard a door shut and she opened her eyes. She was lying on a hospital bed, with a bandage covering a wound on her chest. She looked up and saw Jaylyn, a girl from school, standing beside the bed. Jaylyn smiled.
“Your awake. The doctor wasn’t sure about it for a second back there.”
Rennie felt her chest gingerly.
“What happened? Why didn’t it work?” she said, almost bitterly.
Jaylyn looked confused then sad.
“Why… Why did you try to kill yourself? I think I would have died if you had succeeded.”
“Your lying.” her friend answered.
Jaylyn knelt beside the bed, her bright blue eyes shining with earnestly.
“No! Rennie, I’m not! Do you know how many people have been wanting to see you? How many people are praying for you?”
Tears began to roll down Rennie’s cheeks again.
“I just don’t have anybody left… I don’t.”
Jaylyn’s eye’s softened with un-shed tears.
“Rennie… I’m so sorry. But people love you! There are people that care.”
“Who would want to care about me?” she asked, hopelessly.
“The one who created you cares. He cares for his children.”
Rennie was a Christian, but life had overcome her faith. She looked at her friend again.
“I… I know. But no one else does.”
Jaylyn held Rennie’s hand.
“That doesn’t matter. None of our opinions matter. Only His. And he thinks you are a beautiful child of God.”